when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
