remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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