i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
