i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Randomize
