marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
