I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
