I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Randomize
