I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
whose ass print is on the piano?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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