I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
