i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
