no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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