I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
They took my balls.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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