apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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