So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
