so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Randomize
