you mean i was at the winter classic?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
