i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
