East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
