Can i not drive my cunt home
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Randomize
