She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
my dad came in to wish me a happy birthday and found me passed out in my underwear with the lights on and a plate of meat on the bed. i bet he was proud to have contributed to my creation in that moment.
he shaved USA in his pubs
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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