did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Randomize
