This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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