I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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