I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
