Need sex. Gaining weight.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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