Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
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