I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize