girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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