Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
