Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Randomize