Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Randomize
