I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
