home. puking in laundry basket.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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