I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
