What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize
