I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize