K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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