she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
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it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
