i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize
