I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
