Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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