school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
