Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
