pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
