it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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