I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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