if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize