Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Drake has all the answers
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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