I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Randomize
