dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
